New home and 6 Months old

We moved!!!
We moved from Payson back to Orem in January and are all settled in our new home and LOVING IT!! Our home in Payson on the 5 acres with the farm animals and the big home was fun for the 3 years we lived down there, it was an adventure, but its a chapter of my life that I am glad is past. We are now living in Orem again and I couldn't be happier. Travis is close to work, so his commute is only 5 minutes, which means he gets to spend more time with us girls. Doctors, grocery stores, gas stations, everything is so much closer, and I'm loving that especially with my little girl. I had forgotten how I loved the convenience of being in the city. There will be a few things I miss about Payson, the quiet and space that we had out there was wonderful and the experience of owning Llamas, goats, horses, chickens, and other farm animals will always be a fun memory. Having Llamas watch you eat breakfast through the kitchen windows or going and getting fresh eggs from the chicken coop for breakfast will always be fun memories. But like all great stories, chapters end and new ones begin.
This home is the home that our little angel, Alice will grow up in. And because of that I love this house and move even more!
Travis and I love the character that comes with older homes. We had originally thought of building when we decided we were going to move. But decided to look at older homes. We found the perfect home that still had a lot of the old charm but was nicely updated and modern but had enough projects for us to do to make it ours! It has been amazing! Travis and I have been happier than we have been in a long time! (the stress of trying to have a baby not being an issue anymore I'm sure has helped in this happiness ;) )

Now can you guys believe that my little Peanut (Alice) is going to be 6 months old this WEDNESDAY!!!!!!!!! Because I'm having a hard time believing this!
She is such a smart, fun, loving girl and I couldn't be more happy and blessed in my life to have her as my daughter. She made me a mother, something that I have wanted and worked so hard for!

I know everyone says this but my girl really is the best baby ever, she hardly ever cries unless she is tired and I'm trying to keep her awake or she is hungry.
She sleeps in her own crib now (tear) and sleeps 12 hours straight!!! I put her down at 8:30pm and she wakes up about 8:30am. AMAZING
She has learned to love her rice cereal and fruits and veggies! It seems she can't get enough of them! so far her favorites are bananas, apples, blueberries, and sweet potatoes. She did not like the sweet peas but who can blame her.... i don't even like those. :)

I want to take a moment as a mother and just share my love, joy, opinion, and complete gratitude for my Father in Heaven who looks out for me.
In the 4 years we struggled with infertility and IUI failures and Invitro success and then failures over and over again all I prayed for and dreamed about was becoming pregnant, delivering a healthy baby and raising that child the best i knew how. I would pray and beg over and over again, " please just let me have one child."  And he did eventually bless me with Alice, and i couldn't be more thankful.

Now of course Travis and I would LOVE more than anything to have more children, we always dreamed of having 5-6 kids. But if Alice is the ONLY child we conceived and raised, I would be OK with that. It is after all, what I had prayed and wished so hard for.
Some women may never get the opportunity or blessing of raising at LEAST one child of their own, and this breaks my heart and makes me realize how much I have.
I understand the heartbreak and sadness that comes when you want children, or more children and it doesn't come easy.
For me when I was having a hard time I had to always remind myself to look at what i DID have and not what i didn't.

So if the time comes and we can't have another child or it is really hard and takes along time again I know that I at least have my amazing handsome husband and my amazing beautiful angel of a daughter Alice.

Now don't get me wrong, we will try for more kids and we will try and try and try, but if it doesn't come easy, you will NOT hear my complaining or publicly crying or looking for sympathy from others because I have A child of my own. And it is such a blessing.

I hope what I'm saying is coming off the right way and that I don't hurt feelings. This is just my opinion, the way that I feel about this. That if you have a child and you are publicly complaining that you cannot have more, to stop and think about the women who don't even have one child and may never have a child of their own, to be sympathetic. Of course you have the right to be sad and to do what you want of course, I'm just saying to make sure your not rubbing it into peoples faces.
When i was trying for our first baby it really hurt me when someone was trying for their second or third or even fourth child and were struggling maybe a little or had maybe had a few loses in-between children. They would tell me, " i know exactly how you feel, its so hard." The fact was, NO they didn't know how i felt they had children to keep them busy to love, snuggle and take care of while i was here, childless.
So remember to love who you have. My favorite quote that i found during our Infertility struggles was,
"The things you take for granted, someone else is praying for." I love that, it keeps my focus on where it should be. :) OK end of that!!! Sorry if that was a little deep or random or blunt but this is after all my blog and maybe i wanted to remind myself for the future, or give a gentle reminder for others who may not have thought of this.

OK

Here is what little miss Alice has been up to in the last 3 months since i blogged
-she is eating rice cereal and baby foods now!!
-she holds her own bottle
-she can easily roll from her tummy to her back (hates being on her tummy)
-her eyes are still blue and i think they will stay that color! They are a gorgeous icy color.
-no teeth still
-but she drools SO MUCH, she is always soaking wet
-loves to chew or suck on everything
-loves eating from her new highchair
-sits up pretty great but will still fall over from time to time
-LOVES people!
- she also loves the dogs and cat!
-loves to hear music
-she sleeps through the night in her own room in her crib
-loves her bath time and splashing
-loves phones and cameras
-loves mirrors, or maybe just herself in mirrors ;)
-she recently started sharing her Binky with mom and dad
-loves to watch the dogs play fetch, she laughs so hard at them!
-and she loves to swing outside on our porch swing with mom
She is starting to kind of reach for me but not there completely yet. I can't wait for her to actually reach for me and give me hugs! Things I'm excited and look forward to :)
This little girl along with her daddy are my best friends and my everything that i have on this earth. I couldn't be more grateful! My heart is so full and happy right now!

Thanks for reading and seeing whats up with us. here are a few pictures!! (the best part I think)

And that's our sweet girl! I'll try and post more often but if you want pictures I'm most consistent with Instagram. feel free to follow us at @orianat13 for pictures!!
Thanks for reading.

3 Months

Im not very good at keeping an updated blog. Sorry about that, but now that the holidays are over I have a little time to update.
Holidays are the best when you have kids. It has been so much fun to share these days with Travis and Alice. Christmas Eve, and Christmas day was perfect. Alice was such a happy baby those two days it was so amazing. Not that she isnt a happy baby every day but those days felt extra special.
Alice actually turned 3 months  old on Christmas. Has it really already been 3 months? I cant believe time has gone by that fast. Now im not going to lie and say there hasnt been hard days, because there has but I promised myself that if I was ever blessed with a child that I would never complain about them. It used to make me so sad and angry to hear or see people complaining about their children and having children.
Alice has been without a doubt the biggest blessing in my life. I dont want to imagine a world without her. Her smile is infectious and she has the quirkiest little attitude! I am LOVING the baby stage but I also cant wait to see her grow up and show us more of that little personality.
She loves to talk to people and suck on her fists/fingers. She is a massive drooler right now, but no teeth yet (thank heavens). She sits up pretty good without too much head bobbing. She can roll from her tummy to her back but lets be honest she doesnt really get that much time on the floor :) if im not holding her someone else in the house is. She is one very loved girl! As for sleeping, she goes to bed around 9:30-10 at night and sleeps until 8-8:30 in the morning. Its been like this for 2 months. I am one lucky mom! I have always gotten at least 5 hrs of sleep with her since she was born. Its been amazing!
On other news and updates. We are moving. Yup we are leaving Payson behind and coming back to Orem :) I am so excited. I will miss this home only because its where we lived when my angel was born.  Well thats it for now. Here are some pictures :) enjoy.

Ended the year 2014 with kisses!!!

Birth Story

So I really have meant to write a few posts before Alice actually got here but that didn't happen as we can see. Sorry about that!
I have had a few requests to share my birth story, and i would like to have it written somewhere so i don't forget it so here it is...

Wednesday September 24th i lost my "Plug" i was so excited because id heard and googled it and lots of what i found said that if closer to your due date you lost this it meant labour was soon on its way. I was so excited because i was 5 days away from due date and i felt like i was never going to have this baby girl, I felt like i was going to be largely pregnant forever! Wednesday went on and nothing happened no painful contractions just the usual Braxton Hicks. Travis got home from work we ate dinner and watched Netflix before going to bed at about 10:30-11:00. I remember waking up at 12:30 and thinking what a weird dream i had just had and felt the urge to pee. As i lay perfectly still in bed trying to convince myself i could hold it i realized i felt like i had maybe peed a little already so i quickly jumped up and ran to the bathroom. Well as i got up a gush of fluid came out of me! I was so sleepy i wasn't sure what had happened actually happened.... after peeing I put my contacts in got dressed and prepared in case what i thought had happened (that my water had broken) actually happened. I climbed back in bed and woke Travis up telling him i thought that my water broke but i wasn't sure. I asked if we should go to the hospital or wait. He told me whatever i felt like we should do we would do. I told him lets go back to sleep and if i get painful contractions we will go. I lay back down and not 3 minutes later i had 2 sharp painful contractions that felt like really painful menstrual cramps with the addition of my whole stomach going hard as a rock. I woke Travis up and said its Go Time!! He jumped right up got dressed and out the door we went! We ended up at Labor and Delivery at about 1am. The Nurses were asking me all these questions and all i could focus on was the fact that i felt like i was PEEING MY PANTS!! As we got the Labor and Delivery another bigger gush of fluids came. The got me into a nice big room that had a big comfy sofa and told me to get completely undressed and into their hospital gown. They checked to make sure the fluid was actually amniotic fluid and sure enough it was. So i was officially there in the hospital until our girl was born. Travis and i were so excited, they got me all hooked up to monitors got an IV going and then it was time to wait. I dilated to about a 4 before i realized that i could have the epidural anytime i wanted since my water was already broken. So i told them to go ahead and call the anesthesiologist. The worst part about the epidural was the small poke at the very beginning to numb you. My whole body was shaking from being tired and in pain from the contractions that having to hunch forward over my massive belly and get a sharp poke in my back just wasn't very fun. But it was short lived and after that i had the gloriousness of no longer feeling pain. At one point my whole right side went completely numb and i had to be propped to the side to even out the drugs haha. I couldn't imagine doing all this without the epidural especially because i knew i didn't have to. It was a life saver.
Not much happened during the day besides waiting and waiting and watching Travis eat since i wasn't allowed to. I was in Labor for 20 hours. I dilated all the way to a 9 and then my body decided to STOP! They upped my Pitocin from a 2 to a 6.... another hour went by, no change. They upped my pitocin to an 8 and let another hour go by... and still no change and by now i was feeling each contraction no matter how many times i pushed the button for more epidural fluid to numb the pain. I was feeling it all! After no change in 2 1/2 hours at a 9 my Dr finally came in checked me and said lets up her to 10 on Pitocin and if nothing changes in half hour with that we may want to talk about doing a C-Section. He was worried that with my water being broken for already 20 hrs that risk of infection could happen. Baby was fine she wasn't stressed i was fine i wasn't stressed but he didn't want to wait any longer. So after half hour passed and there was still no change we scheduled the C-Section and after 20 minutes we were headed to have our baby!! I was so nervous because i knew you were awake for C-Sections and i was freaking out thinking i was going to feel everything that the anesthesia wasn't going to work right on me. But after i was all prepped and ready they tested the anesthesia and i passed i was numb even though i was able to wiggle my toes which totally freaked me out. I couldn't feel pain but i could feel pressure and tugging it wasn't very pleasant. As the Dr was getting to where the baby was and they could finally see her they said, " Wow no wonder your body stopped dilating look at the cheeks on this girl!!"
The Dr. looked at Travis and said, "Dad do you want to watch this?" Travis jumped up after being by my head and went around the curtain blocking my view. What sounded like a water balloon popped and i heard a faint little whimper and then felt them pull her out of me, it was like someone had been sitting on my stomach and they had just gotten up. Weight was lifted off my back and i felt light. I started to cry uncontrollably as i head that baby make her little noise. The lifted her over the curtain so i could see her and all i saw was dark brown hair and indeed cheeks!!! I was so happy. Travis was able to come around and show her to me before he went with her up to the nursery, she was beautiful and i had never been more in love with Travis then seeing him hold our little girl for the very first time! Travis left with Alice to the nursery and that's when the worst of it all happened. The tugging and the pulling and everything to put me back together and all that jazz that goes along with having a C-section, i asked for more pain medicine since the pressure and tugging was getting too much my body was shaking so bad i couldn't control myself. My anesthesiologist was amazing and so so nice. after giving me more paid meds through my IV i almost immediately felt comfortable and almost fell asleep on the operating table.
Once they were done stitching me up they wheeled me into the room we had been in all day and there was my parents and youngest sister Cassie and Travis mom and oldest sister Tiffany. Travis came in with Alice all nice and clean. He handed her to me and i was in heaven. I had started to shake again and was so tired and week that it was difficult for me to hold my baby girl so i made Travis sit on the bed with me holding her so i could look at her and touch her.
After everyone left we were taken to a "recovery room" it had two beds in it and was smaller then the first room but still pretty big!
We decided to take Alice for the first night to the Nursery since we were both so exhausted after being up 24 hrs but as Travis walked her to the Nursery he passed it and came right back telling me he couldn't do it. And i told him i was glad because i hoped he would bring her back. Our little angel was so quiet hardly made any noise and was doing awesome at latching on to feed.

I didn't get much sleep but enough to give me energy for the next day. My Dr. came in and told me how he had gone to the nursery after stitching me up and told Travis that he has no idea how he was delivering a baby from me. After Alice came out he was checking my organs and fallopian tubes and ovaries to make sure everything was ok and he told us with how much scar tissue was covering my ovaries, tubes, and uterus the ONLY explanation for us conceiving a child was that it was a miracle. There was no way that we should have been able to become pregnant on our own. But he was only telling us what we already knew :). He also told us that while he was in there he removed as much of the scar tissue as he felt was safe and possible without causing more scar tissue to help us with future pregnancies in being naturally conceived. This C-Section was a blessing in disguise.

We were in the hospital for 4 days. And on our second day there, the day after id just delivered the head nurse came into our room.....
She started out with, "Now i don't want you to freak out,".... but obviously starting with that I'm freaking out. She went on the say how there had been 2 C-Sections, mine last night and another this morning and after each procedure they do a "tool" check make sure that all the things they used are accounted for... and there was a pair of metal clamps missing.... and the morning C-Section all accounted for their items so it was from my C-Section last night... she said she wanted to do an Xray to make sure that they didn't leave it inside of me.
ARE YOU KIDDING ME!!! YOUR TELLING ME I MIGHT HAVE SOME METAL CLAMP INSIDE OF ME?!?! THAT I MIGHT HAVE TO BE OPENED BACK UP TO GET THIS THING OUT!!! she told me that its not likely that its in there but better to be safe then sorry. I was FREAKING OUT!! After about 5 minutes after the Xray she came back in and said, "Your good its not in there." and then told me that sometimes Dr's don't think about it and will take extra tools home with them or that they get put in the wrong spots or other things like that but it is procedure to make sure its not left INSIDE SOMEONE!!! ugh if i were to complain about anything during my time in the hospital it would be this. haha Its ok to look back now and laugh about it but i wasn't laughing about it while in the hospital!

Alice is now 2 1/2 weeks old and everything is amazing! I am loving being a mom and Travis is an amazing dad. We couldn't be happier.

We did have a pretty traumatizing experience 4 days after coming home from the hospital. On Alice's 1 week she threw up that night all over Travis and stopped breathing. She turned purple and we were freaking out we tried to get her to breath but she just wouldn't... i ran downstairs and grabbed my mom who had already gone to bed and she didn't know what to do either. Travis called 911 and had them send an Ambulance while i tried to suction out her nose to see if it would help her breath. I was on the phone with the dispatcher as Travis was at the front door waiting for the Ambulance to arrive. It felt like FOREVER waiting for them to get there. i had Alice on her back on the floor with her head tilted back so that her airways were open and she was getting short little breaths in but was still getting more purple.
The ambulance finally arrived and they grabbed her and off we went to the hospital. The Lady that had Alice was suctioning out her nose and mouth and having to give Alice mouth to mouth because she was refusing to breath on her own.
Once we got to the ER she was doing much better but was needing oxygen assistance. They did an Xray of her lungs to make sure there was no infection or any other problem. It came back normal. The ER Dr told us that she needed to be on oxygen until she was able to breath well enough on her own and that with such a traumatic experience like this for her at so young it raised her chances of SIDS. Just what us new parents wanted to hear. So we took an ambulance ride up to Timpanogos Hospital Pediatrics where they were waiting for us.
We were there for another 4 days as they did all kinds of tests that they could think of to make sure they crossed everything off the list. Our little angel passed all the tests with flying colors. What they say must have happened is when she threw up she inhaled some back down and couldn't catch her breath and after that her lungs being so new were exhausted and needed help for a few days after until they were strong again.
They sent us home with oxygen and a monitor for her breathing and heart rate for our piece of mind. She didn't end up needing any oxygen at home thank the heavens and we were able to take her off the monitors after 3 days at home.
She is happy healthy and perfect today. And even though i had hopped to NEVER have an experience like that it has taught us a lot and we now know how to handle the situation should it ever happen again.

Our baby girl Alice was born September 25th at 9:59pm weighing 9lbs 13oz and was 21 1/2 inches long. She was a big baby... my mom said that i was 9lbs 12oz so i guess she takes after me.


Also to any expecting moms... I wished someone had warned me about this before so let me share with you, if you decide to breast feed (which if you can, i highly recommend it, it has helped me to recover so quickly and has so many amazing benifits.) But if you decide to breast feed know this... when your milk comes in it will hurt! You will feel like you have two massive boulders on your chest. I found that a warm shower helps a little with this. Also feeding will hurt really really bad the first week, a warm shower is also helpful to help with the pain. And lastly.... RT hurts when you are breast feeding so keep those girls warm ALWAYS! this may not be the same for everyone but this was my experience so i am sharing incase it helps anyone else. :)

I dont have the hospital pictures on my computer just yet so here are some pictures my best friend took of little Alice at 6 days old. enjoy :)

P.s i hope this all makes sense. I feel like i just jumbled all my thoughts and memories on here and so i hope it makes sense to you.

30 Weeks and a Photoshoot!

So i have this best friend who is a pretty amazing photographer and yesterday she did maternity pictures for me! They were so fun and i love how they turned out! If you are looking for a photographer she is your gal!
I wanted my pictures to turn out kind of woodland dream feeling and i feel like that's what i got and I'm so so happy with it so i figured i would share some of the photos she gave me with you!!

I love them and am so happy with them!!! Thank you Courtney you are the BEST!!

Also on other news, I am at 30 weeks!!!! The count down begins! 10 weeks left at the most! Great news is that my Dr. doesn't like his patients to go past their due dates so its pretty exciting to know that there are only 10 weeks at the most left!!!! AHHHH I cannot believe it! After 4 1/2 long years and many many tears, prayers, needles and trials of loss later we are ALMOST holding our baby girl! I honestly never thought this day would happen but i am so glad that it is!

2 weeks ago i had to do the Glucose test and my results came back perfect which was nice! I wasn't worried but there is always that small worry. Baby girl is growing just perfect and her heartbeat is still nice and strong! She still moves ALOT! Now that she is bigger its not so much kicks anymore but just her rolling around kicking, elbow knees shoulders on my hips and all that fun stuff! I'm loving it! The only part that isn't so fun is when she kicks my bladder and no matter how much is in there i always feel like i have to pee soooo bad! But all in all i have LOVED being pregnant i have had such an awesome experience!