Thursday, October 28, 2010

long time!

Wow it really has been a long time since my last post. Oops, :) Work has been good, busy but good and the first paycheck was awesome!! :) with some of the extra money i went and got my nails done so i could feel pretty, my hands were so ugly with broken nails and just dry and yuck! so i went and got pretty nails put on!! i love them!!! i also have found a new obsession, those watch bracelets. My friend gave me one as a starter and i fell in love, and because i work at a store that has so many cute beads i got a bunch and have been making the bracelets for the watch. its so much fun, im learning and the ones ive made aren't the best but they are ok. ill bet better with practice im sure! :) life has been really good, its been busy and sadly full of junk food. Another month gone by still no baby and sadly the way i deal with that stress is not drugs and alcohol but caramels and Mountain Dew!!!!! hahah don't worry soon ill stop but its just so good right now :) no im not too down, but just with this week having my unfriendly monthly visitor come and also my brothers new baby in the same week was just a little hard to handle but im actually handling it very well i think :) i just keep myself busy and that works out good!!! So we got our first snow of the year yesterday!!!!! really? snow already.... cant we please just wait til December for that, i don't mind it being cold but please make the snow wait til December at least!!! GEEE!! well i thought i would have a lot more to post about but i actually dont, today is my day off and i wanted to catch up on my blog and catch up on reading all of yours so i decided to jump on!! im gonna post some pictures for you so you can see the things ive been making lately~!! ohhhh i also made some more cute hair flowers with Leah the other night!!! it was so much fun, we had a blast, i haven't taken any pics of those yet sadly but i will soon and ill post them on here so you can see how cute they are!!

haha yeah i took some pictures of my nails. i like them because they arent obvious and they have sparkles :)

pretty nails :D

The watch bands i made!

Watch bands with the watch face :)
Watch face with bands, and pretty nails, i feel really flashy now :)

Wednesday, October 13, 2010

just some thoughts

An update on work, the hard weeks are over, no more 12, 13 hour days i can finally slow down to 8 hour days and then maybe even 6. Work is going good the store has opened and the Grand opening is October the 18th, that will be a crazy day. But because i have been working so much i haven't gotten to check my blog as much as i like to, and to catch up on all of yours.
Its sad to read how many people are having the same problem we have been having, infertility.
It really is one of the hardest things i have ever had to experience.... the past 2 nights i have had baby dreams, the first i was in the hospital bed, i turned to look at my brand new baby girl in the bed next to mine, i turned away and when i looked back, it wasnt that beautiful baby girl that was once there, but a small dog...... The second dream i was in the hospital preparing to give birth, not the normal way but a dream way... i cant explain it but it was really weird, before i was going to have this baby i left the hospital to go get food, i guess while i was sleeping i was really hungry cuz i dreamed of going to get food.... hahah funny huh? Since those 2 dreams i havent had a baby related dream, but 2 in a row was strange to me. i know i comment alot on this subject and im always getting the response, "Your still young." "There is always more time" "You have only been married a year and a half." and "Dont worry your time will come"
The reason i write about infertility and my feelings on here is not to have them fixed but to help me, to feel better so i dont have all these feelings bottled up inside so that one day i just blow up and go crazy. I often talk to my husband about it but he can only take so much of it to. Its so hard on him and i see it every day.
The other night we were laying in bed talking and he stops for a minute and then says, "I really want to have kids now" not that he didnt before, but he is in the same boat as i am, tired of waiting for the possibility and then the let down of a negative test. I know he is more than ready to be a dad, and i know he is going to be an amazing one at that! its just so hard for me to see him so sad about it, we often forget how this can effect our husbands.
I must say, that working so much has helped to keep my thoughts about babies busy, and its kept me occupied. For which i am thankful. I just know that when its finally my turn and i finally get to be pregnant and hold that sweet baby of mine in my arms that i will know how hard i fought to bring this baby into the world and it will be so special to me because of the trials we had to face to bring them here to our family.
To all you mothers with children, dont for one second take that for granted you have the best gift life can bring you.
And for all you struggling with infertility, i know your pain, together we can all hang in there together and get through this!! We must stay positive and keep going with life, it doesnt stop because we fall down and skin our knee.... WE CAN DO THIS!! :) i just wanted to share those thoughts.
My sister in law, that lives next door is due any time this week, im scared of how i will feel seeing that new baby boy and how i will act. But i am also the happiest i have been in a long time knowing what a great husband i have and what a great life we have together. Life gives us trials to make us stronger, god will not give you a trial that you cannot overcome.
Sorry this is so long i just felt like i needed to write this post! i love you all!!!! :D

Tuesday, October 5, 2010

ughh the death of me!!!

ok so i got that job at Hobby Lobby right? So my first day was tuesday, not so bad we put up all the walls and bases of the walls and all this hard labor stuff.... not too bad i worked 11-8pm. I ended up getting Wednesday off. Then came back again Thursday 8-6. And then here comes the killer, since the store is new and opening up on the 18th of October there is TONZ of stuff to be put up in this store, if you have ever been in a Hobby Lobby, you understand how much stuff there is, TONZ!!!!! Friday, Saturday, Sunday, Monday and today was 12 sometimes 13 hour shifts...... and i feel like im gunna die!!!! my feet hurt so bad, and my back aches, i worked almost 70 hours in about a week...... i cant wait til i get a day off to sleep in past 6 and to just relax my body. But its getting more fun as we put all the merchandise up. I just felt like i needed to get on her and blog about it, just because i like to blog and of lately i havent had the time or energy to get on the computer and do so. Sorry this is such a boring post, hopefully fun events are close by. Oh and one little thing i want to add, my husband is the best ever, he is so sweet i leave at 6:50 am and dont get back til 7pm and poor travis walks to work, but the sweet boy cleans the house every day for me before he leaves or work so that when i get home i dont have to do anything, its so nice, i love him so much and was so lucky to find him! thats all, i just wanted to add in how awesome my husband is :D