Oh what a week....

This is how i felt this week... like i was in a storm

Well you know how i struggle with getting pregnant and yet i always seem to be talking about it. I'm sorry about that, but this is my blog :) 2 weeks ago i started to feel really tired all the time and i had a sour stomach 90% of the time as well, i didn't want to psych myself out like i ALWAYS do so i tried not to think anything of it, well after about 3 days after i was supposed to start i started to get super excited, i haven't been late in over 6 months this had to be it!! It had to finally be my time!! So after work i went to the store and bought some pregnancy tests. I waited til the next morning to take it, and to no ones surprise it was negative. Well after another 3 days i took a second test, and again a very clear negative. At this time i was about 6 days late and still had hope since i had just heard a story from a friend that her sister took 4 tests within the time period of a week and the 4th one came out positive so i was positive that everything would work out and i would still be pregnant. Well i feel like someone is trying to break my spirits because on day 7 of being late my non-friend decided to show up. So what is wrong with me?! Why get me wishing and praying and excited just to tear my down and break my spirits again, hasn't 2 years been enough of that!? I know that this is my trial but its like telling a kid to grab a cookie from the cookie jar but every time he sticks his hand in to grab one he gets shocked over and over again as he is trying. I am trying to be obedient and create life to grow up in the gospel but why isn't he letting me?? I guess i still have much to learn and my will to keep fighting is slowly falling apart. Needless to say this week has been hard, EVERYONE is pregnant!! and im not being dramatic i mean literally everyone i know and their dogs are pregnant! And while i am happy for them, i just want to be like them. Anyways that's all that has really happened lately, Travis birthday, my birthday and Christmas in California are all coming up in the next few months so that will be exciting. Work is going good, its been pretty busy so it will be nice once it slows down if it does, i have learned to really appreciate my weekends off.

My RS presidency stoped by the house the other night to visit with me which was really nice, im so gratefully for the amazingly welcoming and friendly ward we are now in.

This Sunday Travis best friend/Cousin Brock is having his homecoming up in Tooele so it will be very nice to see him again, i know that Travis is excited.

Well i think that's about all i had on my mind, its nice to let it all out it feels good to let go and just shed the layers that seem to pile up on you.

I often feel like all i do is complain about my problems so im sorry to all you readers, but it helps me to not go crazy.

small project

I feel pretty good about these last 2 posts having pictures in them :) granted the last posts' picture was from google, it was at least a picture. Last Saturday i decided to do a little paint project, nothing big but something fun that would take a little bit of time.
This little night stand has been in my family forever!! i think its original color was creme or maybe white, but it went through red, lavender, turquoise and now a mustard yellow ish. had the paint been in good condition i would have left the color cuz i liked it and it went well with my living room but Koda decided it was at good biting range and decided to chew off the paint... grr but what else do you expect from pups? Luckily i had this yellow paint that my mom gave me when she moved. So i painted. I must say i do like the yellow so much better than the blue that it was before, it just looks better in the house.

After

Before with Kodas lovely chewing marks
Before

Halloween!!

So with the start of this month i have been thinking of a fun non expensive Halloween costume... and this is what I'm thinking so far....

How do you say can you be a statue?? well that's the fun part, white paint, and white hair dye, i will have gold accessories though maybe... but with just some old white sheets i could make this so fun and it wouldn't cost hardly anything!!! I'm not positive if this will be my costume for this year but its most likely going to be. :) I'm trying to convince Travis do do it with me, we will see. So no one steal my idea :D unless i decide not to do it... whats your feedback?

Lack of Pictures

I would like to start of and apologize for my lack of pictures on my blog lately. Since i work on a computer everyday all day i dont feel the need to get on my computer at home i choose to do other things. So since im only on the computer at work i am without all of my pictures. I have decided to bring them here to my work so that i dont have to make you suffer with just words. I always find looking at pictures to be so much fun the visual just makes it so much more fun! So no worries hopefully by my next post i will have a photo or 2 along with it :)

So remember how my pug was in heat and got banned to the outside/downstairs part of the house. Well it turned her rouge!! She is crazy now and wont listen to me when normally she was pretty good to listen to me. Also she is shedding like CRAZY.... im not being dramatic at all, i honestly didnt know a little dog could lose sooo much hair!!! Travis and i gave her a bath last night and tried to get rid of all the loose hair, which by the way was a hamster size clump of hair. Now this morning when i came to see her she was still shedding hair everywhere..... i honestly am so sick of this already... i want to take her to the Groomers but dont know if that will help that much either. Who knows, not me.

Anyways other than that, life has been, wake up get ready for work leave, come home watch Gossip Girl season 1 which i just started thanks to Courtney :) then i do a little bit of house work, cleaning, laundry dishes, whatever needs to be done, then wait for Travis to get home around 9-10pm make something for dinner if i didnt already do it before then we talk a little about our day and then watch an episode of 2 of Criminal Minds season 6 before going to bed. Fun huh? haha oh man. thats why i love my weekends i get to spend all weekend outside and with my dear husband, and i love it!!

Also i dont really want to whine about my sad sob story again so i wont but this month for some reason has been extremely hard for me with not being able to get pregnant. I dont know why but it has been so hard. And thats all i will say :) I am so excited for General Conference this weekend also, it will be a great blessing.

Alright im out of here so until next time!! :)

FALL

Can i just say how excited i am for fall!!! I have decided that as much as i love summer, i love Spring and Fall maybe a tiny bit more!!! I love the jackets and the scarfs and the boots you get to wear when its spring and fall!

Sadly this summer Travis and i didn't not go swimming ONCE!!! How sad is that?!?! Pathetic huh? but i guess when your busy and penny pinching to buy a house that's what happens!! :) P.S. i love having our very own house, nothing beats it!

Life is going great for us, Travis is in school and all though its hard he is making it through, along with working full time. I am also working full time, we both have great jobs. We have fun cute animals that love us, our own house, we now have 2 cars so we don't have to stress about how someone is going to get to work. Now "hint hint" the only thing left for us right now is to get pregnant!!! :) please please let this be our month.... i have been trying to be better, no more soda for me, and ive been doing better on the foods i eat, i haven't been able to be as active as id like since i work at a desk for most of my day. But ive been doing my best to make sure Travis and i are not stressed out!! I mean come on if we aren't getting prego from stress you cant be stressed for 2 years straight!!!! can you? hahah anyways im crossing my fingers and hoping for the best so i can join all you cute prego mommas. I envy you! Maybe hopefully after 2 1/2 years it will finally be my turn!!

Anyways sooo excited for boots and scarfs!!!!!

HAPPY FALL WEATHER!